I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
Randomize
