He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
