You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
