In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Randomize
