I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
This is my life. Enjoy the view
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
