Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
