I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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