She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
She sprinted out of the bathroom and ran all the way into the middle of the street. Five minutes later she came back with a banana nut muffin. She's that kind of drunk.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
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