Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
Randomize
