Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
