I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I'm gunna send you baby bottles of vodka for those nights when you just give up
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
I have feelings that need drinking.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
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