some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
