I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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