Don't you send me to vm
please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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