Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
You've slept with someone mentioned in the NY Times, that officially makes you the most famous person I know.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
And then he peed in my hair
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