oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
Bring me that man meat
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize
