his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
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