My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
Randomize
