Whats the glycemic index on semen?
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
No you don't understand. This tree is really alive. Like in Pocahontas.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
