It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
We've already decided our costumes for next Halloween. She's going as Cookie Monster and I'm going as Elmo. She's just going to ask for Oatmeal Cookie shots, and I'm asking for Red-Headed Slut shots.
Dude, its January.
We're going to do the voices too.
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Can you help me get ready before work? I need a look that says I'm-happy-to-help-but-I'm-hungover-so-leave-your-attitude-at-the-door-because-I'm-not-taking-anyone's-shit-today.
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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