Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
