you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
