just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize
