I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Randomize
