my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
dude, I just walked in on your little brother changing clothes...I'm ashamed to say I noticed, but that kid has as MASSIVE cock...
Yeah...we all know. it's the elephant in the room at family gatherings.
that is a frighteningly accurate metaphor for it.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
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