It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
