We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
