Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
