..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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