I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
That awkward moment when you were so fucking drunk lastnight that you and your fuck buddy wake up wearing eachother's clothing covered in hot cheetos with his cat curled up between your heads meowing. Thought you'd appreciate this moment with me.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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