You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Randomize
