whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Randomize
