It's Friday. Sex?
I think my vagina is haunted
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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