Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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