she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
Randomize
