I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
