if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
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