i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
