I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
