Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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