Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
So the tow truck driver didn't charge us because Ian convinced him that he was sent out by God to share his cocaine with us.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Randomize
