So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
we made out on top of his cat.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize
