There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
