Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Randomize
