she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
there is a video of me on Facebook getting mad at a trash bin what the fuck was in your Pepsi
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Randomize
