Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize
