I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Randomize
