this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
