What did we do last night that was yellow?
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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