Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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